TIPS I have to get the most out of your Class Pass experience in PILATES CLASS

January 19, 2016

Holy Shit Y’all <insert: forced Texas drawl>

It’s been a minute. Oh, how I missed your slutty eyeballs.

…But now we’re here together, so I won’t harp on why my ass didn’t deliver last week. No. It’s about the POWER OF NOW, said Eckhart Tolle – a book I highly recommend.


Well, winter has finally arrived in New York City.


See exhibit A.

Exhibit A:

IMG_0456It was imperative to cover part of the face when I walked to hot yoga in the balmy 19 degree weather that graced us this morning.

So, it’s cold as balls.

…What else should I tell you?

Oh! I’m about to start my dot (code for period), my boobs are sore, and I’m not in the mood for slow people, superfluous talking, or bullshit of any kind…but somehow, I’m always tested during such a time.

Today I’d like to talk about this thing called Class Pass.

From the perspective of a teacher, Class Passers can be somewhat of a nuisance, which is why I felt compelled to suggest ways that will not only improve your experience (as a Class Passer), but will also make your Pilates teacher very happy and able to do their job better.

If you’re in the dark on Class Pass, here it is in a nutshell:


Many of you have probably heard of it, or likely use it. The concept is cool – instead of paying $100+/month to belong to ONE gym, this allows you to explore dozens of other fitness studios around town for basically the same amount. It’s $125 for an unlimited monthly pass in NYC. You can go back the same studio up to 3x’s a month.

In theory, this all sounds great, but on the end of a fitness TEACHER, the experience can be nightmare-ish.

Here are some TIPS I have to get the most out of your Class Pass experience in PILATES CLASS:

1). Come on time. Class passers tend to be late. What makes this even more intolerable as a teacher, is that it is often their first time at the studio, and first time to ever do Pilates. The beginning of class is when fundamental concepts are reviewed, setting the stage for the next 50 minutes. If you miss that, you’re probably not going to understand the rest of the exercises very well. In my mind, you snooze, you fucking lose. Ask me questions after class, but don’t be an asshole and disrupt my class to ask something that I have already taken the time to explain. COME ON TIME. COME ON TIME.

2). Opt for basic level classes if it’s your first time to do Pilates. Again, if you “think” you’ve done Pilates before, guess what – you HAVEN’T. Want to know what else? THAT’S OKAY. It’s totally cool to be a beginner. In fact, it’s awesome. If you do not understand the basic concepts of Pilates, none of the sexy, advanced shit will make sense to you = it will be INEFFECTIVE for your body, because you won’t be able to do it RIGHT, you’ll make my eyes bleed, and you’re putting yourself at risk for injury. Be responsible and leave your ego way the fuck, like a 100 miles out the door if you want to actually learn and gain something from the method.

3). Spare me your anonymous feedback – good or bad. Being able to express yourself anonymously over the internet has done great things for our world, but it has also enabled trolls to hate on people every chance they get- which if you have an iota of emotional intelligence, you would understand that these people are just sad and miserable humans who need to shit on others to make themselves feel better. You want me to take your feedback seriously? Talk to me, or send the studio an email – with your name attached – so we can make the changes necessary to improve the experience for everyone, because that is always the goal. I don’t value anonymous feedback, because I don’t know if the source is credible. Before commenting anonymously, think long and hard about why you won’t take ownership for your comments/opinions/feedback…


I’m out. I love you. Stay warm. Own your shit. Don’t be a troll.




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