Three Gifts

December 16, 2015

Yeah Son.

That’s right I’m posting A-GAIN, even though I said the next time you’d probably read me would be in 2016.

This only proves two things:

1). I AM A THUG

2). I AM ALSO A LIAR (but the good kind)

I also took some gay selfies for you

(I mean that in the most positive way, so if you’re looking for an excuse to get offended, fuck off).

Photo on 12-16-15 at 12.21 PM

There are a few things I’d like to point out in this photo.

First, I just went to pound town with a second cup of coffee – it’s actually an almond milk espresso, but that’s a mouthful, and ruined the flow of the sentence. 

Second, I am fully aware that my eyebrows are aggressively colored-in. Just got the brows done. Haaaaaaaayyyyyyy.

Third, yet again, my shirt game is that of a winner…or should I say, lover?

Check it. It says:

LOVERS GONNA LOVE. You know, like haters gonna hate, but for people who are productive with their time.

OH, SNAP. (enunciate with a sharp “p”).

Photo on 12-16-15 at 12.22 PM

K. Next…

Saw this yesterday. It’s the gift that keeps on giving.

IMG_2442

Because I’m one the of hippest people that exists on this planet, I’d also like to bring the “Dab” to your attention. The Whip and the Nae Nae are old news you guys. It’s time to dab…

Lucky for you, it takes much less coordination and rhythm to execute well.

Look.

eyeballs

Now you try. Hehehehehehehe…

Last, but certainly not least, I’ll leave you with this special video of myself performing flawless handstand push ups at our studio Christmas party.

Note: I may or may not have been 3 tequila shots deep. I also ate a floret of broccoli immediately before performing the movement.

I am so stupid, yet undeniably talented.

LOL.

I love you, Putas.

BIG KISS & PEACE SIGN FOR YA.

peace-hands,

dubie-signature-left

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