BABIES of my LIFE!!!
...Excuse while I inhale my phenomenal open fried egg and avocado sandwich. I have barely eaten a morsel of food, and I've deleted, like, 5 million calories with some magical Pilates and hot yoga.
Holla...but holy shit. I NEED TO FEED, or else I'll get hood on someone. For real.
Lesson be learned: Don't fuck with me when I'm hungry...also do not talk to me because I am not listening to you. FacT (emphasis on the T).
I am feeling much, MUCH better! Fabulous, in fact. I'm totally going to have a dessert, but first, I owe you a FAT piece of Dubie ass...
TAP IT, SONS...
If you follow my shit on INSTA, you know I traveled 6,000 miles over the weekend to celebrate my Canty Lover, aka my future sister-in-law. You could say we had fun in the sun. The #guns and #buns were in FULL EFFECT. <wink wink>
...Obviously, I was still drunk when I boarded my 6:45 a.m. flight back to NYC Sunday morning. I was unacceptable and wanted to stab everyone's eyeballs out - including my own. After 12 hours, a big bowl of pasta (HBunny delivered!), a hot shower, an episode of Orange is the New Black, and 10 hours of sleep, I semi-recovered. I was still in rare form yesterday, but made it top priority to take care of myself because frankly, my 31-year-old body simply CANNOT HANDLE more than two days worth of wild and crazy shenanigans. It was, however, worth EVERY ounce of pain I experienced Sunday, I just need massive TLC now because I'm an old lady who is a very fragile human.
It is also the week before my dot = EXTRA EMO DUBIE = FUCKING ANNOYING.
<Sigh>. What tends to happen this time of the month is that I am more easily offended, I take things personally when I shouldn't, I cry all of the time about things that aren't even sad, I want to delete everyone, all people annoy me (with the exception of a few), I am capable of being very bitchy, I am bratty, I am hard on myself, nothing is ever good enough.
I know I'm not batshit crazy. I know you all can relate to a degree. Don't lie bitches.
Because I am so aware of this, I am always trying to make it better, not let myself get sucked into the negativity. Some months are better than others. But, lately, my "theme" for my own personal growth, is to be nicer to myself. Especially NOW when I know I am predisposed to it.
Isn't that sweet? I think so.
Even though I always think I can be better at ALL things...part of that process - of improving, growing, changing - is to accept where you are NOW. Be proud, thankful and grateful for what you have, what you can do, and how you positively affect the lives of others NOW. Like TODAY. Like this VERY SECOND. THIS VERY MINUTE. Because, at the end of the day the past and the future do not matter. REAL TIME matters. Consuming your thoughts with things of the past and the future are mere distractions from the FUCKING AMAZING that can happen RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW.
...One last thing I am compelled to share before I say peace. Today I woke up feeling physically spent (but you know that doesn't stop me from exercise). I did Pilates AND then I did a hot yoga class right after because that's usually my jam, and I always feel fabulous afterward. In class, I was really struggling - usually I just push through and try to go balls to the wall with every pose/expression because I am a crazy person in that way, but today I was totally okay with modifying - I even took a brief child's pose to give myself some relief! This might sound ridiculous, but for me, this was a big deal. This was my way of being nicer to myself. Being okay with what my body could give IN THE MOMENT. I am proud. Tear.
My advice to you: Be nice to yourself. Modify. Take breaks. We all need them.
UGH. Who's over this? I am. I love you.